You know all those stupid emails you get warning you about the hazards or effects of a faulty product or a bad cold medicine or something heinously dangerous like that? Yeah, well here’s mine.
BEWARE!! Kids everywhere are turning into Village of the Damned children due to the ill effects of the Nintendo D.S.
They may cause your child to:
Search for a pot in your LIVING ROOM in which to cook mac n cheese.
Argue that
Children will not only forget to practice their piano on a daily basis, they may forget they are even taking it.
Children will walk slower, pick their noses longer, and will certainly forget basic hygiene skills such as brushing teeth and washing hands.
They will stay in their pajamas ALL day with faces glued to small electronic device stopping only to smile when the said object gives birth to a REAL LIVE animal. (don’t even get me started on the REAL argument. And NO, taking care of a video game does NOT prove you are ready for a real puppy.)
Children will gravitate towards other children with like devices and huddle quietly for hours. Oh. Wait. I like that part.
So parents, if you love and care for your children, do NOT allow them anywhere near these satanic video game devices. And if your kids get twerked off at you for it, buy em a Popple or teach em how to make a mix tape. Kept me happy in the 80s.
